Date: Wed, 10 Jul 1996 00:11:47 -0700
From: (Laura Werner)
Subject: My inner top

Hi everyone,

I had a wonderful time at a play party on Saturday night, and I want to share it a bit. Yes, another one of my pro-sm sermons. :-) I remember reading party reports here and on a.s.b back when I was lurking, and they helped me work up the courage to go to my first party. Now I can try to return the favor.

Near the beginning of the party, I got a nice tag-team flogging. My friend with the strong arm was helping teach another woman how to use a flogger, and they borrowed my back and my deerskin flogger for practice. It was kind of fun in a weird sort of way, although I had to keep encouraging the, uh, trainee to swing the thing harder. That flogger is very sensual and is nice for a warmup, but you have to swing it extremely hard to get any bite from it. (It's Sarah Lashes' standard deerskin model, for anyone who's interested.)

After the "traning session" ended, my friend continued flogging me while the other participants watched. I had to get her to slow down and give me a warmup first, because all of the other woman's practice strokes hadn't done much. But after that, she really tore into me. It's amazing how much sting she can get out of such a soft flogger. I actually started to cry during the whipping, which had never happened to me before. Until then, I'd only cried during more intimate spanking scenes. It was kind of nice, but I was a bit freaked to be crying in such a casual, public scene.

An hour or so later, I was chatting with another woman and she seemed to want to play, so I asked if I could spank her. I was kind of nervous; I haven't topped too much lately, and I hadn't given a real spanking in over a year. Plus I know she's played with a lot of really experienced people, so I was afraid I wouldn't measure up. But I decided to go for it, and I'm very glad I did. I'm now starting to remember why I was primarily the top in my last spanking relationship. It's fun!

I had her lay down on top of a table with her hands cuffed in front of her, and then I started to spank really gently with my hands. In my last spanking relationship I wasn't a great spanker, but I've now discovered the joys of a good warmup. Gentle spanking isn't quite as realistic if you're into punishment or role play scenes, but it's a wonderful way to ease into things, and it makes the scene last a lot longer.

After the warmup, I started giving fairly hard strokes with my hand, being careful to keep it flexible and cupped rather than using it like a paddle. I then moved on to a yummy small, round leather paddle I bought at a local s/m shop a few weeks ago. It's a great toy, because the leather has a little bit of give and feels a bit more like a hand than a wooden paddle would. I also gave her a few strokes with a wooden paddle and a lucite one, but she didn't seem to enjoy it, so I switched back to alternating between my hand and the leather paddle.

We had a fixed time when we had to be finished with the scene, so as we were approaching the end, I made things really intense. First I gave her some really hard strokes with the paddle, and then I switched to spanking with both of my hands. I tried some alternating strokes, but ended up having more fun with really hard, over the shoulder swings using both hands at once, one on each cheek. The woman I was spanking has a very expressive body (and butt :-) language when she's being spanked, so I could tell she was really enjoying it, and I know I was too.

Afterward, I gave her a back and shoulder rub to help ease her back into the real world, and then we had a few nice hugs. It was wonderful. So wonderful, in fact, that I just had to write about it. The scene was a real confidence builder for me, and I think I might start topping a bit more often now.